Fees

From the little fees at coin machines to the big ones charged by banks, generally speaking, if you’re being charged a fee, you’re being ripped off. Feels good doesn’t it?

There are basically 2 different kinds of fees: the ones that happen regularly, and the ones that happen when you’re a little naughty… which you are.

Let’s start with the easy ones. The best way to avoid a regularly, monthly, or annual fee is to just not sign up for things that have them in the first place. Avoid things like credit cards with annual fees, mutual funds with management or 12B-1 fees, balance transfer fees for loans, or monthly service charges for checking or savings accounts. You can find free versions either through the same company, or a competitor. ‘Cause you’re lazy, no. You’re busy, downloading and watching our show. So we put some links below to help you find free services.

Once you get hooked into monthly fees they just keep bleeding you. Feels good doesn’t it? Most places will keep charging you fees until you ask them to have them removed. So ask! Or get a new account somewhere else.

But what if you bounced a check or missed a credit card payment? Then you’ve probably been slapped with a one-time fee. Unlike monthly fees, this one’s all your fault, and you know it. So, there’s nothing you can do about it right? Of course not! That would be the end of the show.

Just get it waived. It’s like magic and it works for all kinds of fees. You don’t have to lie or have some elaborate story, just call the 800 customer service number and talk to an agent. Say, “I have a fee, or finance charge on my account, and I’d like to get it waived.” Don’t ask if it’s possible, just assume that it is. Because the minute you ask, it instantly becomes impossible.

Here’s another tip: I like to call late at night. You know how everything seems funnier late at night? Well agents seem more pliable; more willing to let you off the hook. It’s a little underhanded, but it works. I can’t explain it, but it works.

But what happens if the evil financial minions say “no?” Don’t panic! You have a backup plan: you hang up the phone, and you call again. But if on the second, third, or fourth try it still doesn’t work, ask to talk to a supervisor. Because they have real power. Occasionally even that won’t work. Now if you absolutely have to get that fee waived, it’s time to play hardball.

Call again, and this time ask to talk to someone about closing your account. They should ask you why you’re closing it. Tell them it’s because the customer service agent wouldn’t waive a fee. Normally, they’ll waive the fee at this point.

Why? Because you, the customer, have value. It costs businesses money to find new customers. So keeping the old ones they have is a good idea. Unless of course, this is like the third month in a row you’ve tried to get it waived… Start paying your bills.

Be very cautious about going to this kind of extreme. The bridge is now burned, and you may wind up paying the fee, and having your account closed to boot.

So remember three things: #1, the best time to avoid a fee is before it ever happens. #2, most fees can be waived with a late night phone call, and #3, all fees are bad. Yeah, all of them.

“Hi I’m calling to waive a fee, yep, yeah it’s for 2 dollars and 30 cents. Yeah I’m cheap like that.”

Transcribed by: Robert B.

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