... And we're back!
…And, we’re back! It’s been a week. And a half. Or two.
If a lie wasn’t a lie when you said it, but because something happened it turned into a lie, is it still a lie? Like when you say, “I’ll be back in a week”, and it turns into a baker’s week…you know, you throw in an extra one for good measure?
I think we need a good name for that. You know, for lies that weren’t, but eventually are. What would you call it?
Not yet lies are a lot like quicksand, ’cause you can’t see them coming, and it looks like everything else, but you step into it, and you’re caught, and you’re sucked down with no chance of escape, ever! …Actually, you can totally escape from quicksand. See, actual quicksand and movie quicksand are totally different things.
Real-life quicksand is rarely more than a few feet deep. It’s made up of a mixture of little grainy particles of sand or other soil that are saturated with water. While it looks stable on the surface, like your mother-in-law, it isn’t. There’s a little “freaky” underneath.
AAAAAH!
And just like that promise you made to be back in one week…dang it.
And just like that promise you made to be back in a week, once you step in, you sink.
AAAAAH! I’m up to my ankles! Quick, someone throw me a rope!
But conventional wisdom has it right. You only sink in as long as you struggle. The more movement and vibration you make, the more you sink. So relax! Just lie around for two weeks! You’ll get out eventually.
And while you’re swimming around in it, just cake some on your face; it’ll be like you’re at a day spa. You’ll look great! No one will notice you were lying in quicksand.
In the movies, quicksand sucks you down like a giant, dirty, wet, watery, vacuum cleaner. And it looks really gross. It’s just like swimming! The more you panic, the more trouble you get into. You can actually float in quicksand. Like you do in water. Dirty water. Thick, dirty water.
O.k., so Hollywood quicksand is totally inaccurate. What’s new? But the name doesn’t even make sense. Why do they call it quicksand if you sink in slowly? Quick can also mean “alive”. And that’s what they’re referring to here. The sand seems alive. Kinda like mercury is called “quicksilver”.
Wow, that was a total tangent! This is like “Tangential What You Ought to Know.”
…And we’re back.
So how are we going to float away from our little going-to-be lie? …I guess we just say that we’re sorry. Sorry. [Camera Guy:] “Me too.”
There. Does that help?
Transcribed by: Erin S.
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27 Comments
interested
Had a great science teacher who once said this: "There are many lies you have been told your entire life: ...Frank Payne
I learned sooooo much from this site.steph
wow a leason on quicksand. awesomeness =] now i know everything about everything because you taught me about quicksand =]John from NIU
woah! cameraman talked!!!! welcome back dudesBob
AH! Camera Man spoke!eric
Welcome Back , you WERE missed !!!Lilmissgeek
yay!! tangents!Aivri
Yay! WYOTK guys are back! Thank god I knew this day would come.Jim
thank god you are back lolBeta
Missed you guys...I was worried you got a big Hollywood deal and skipped out on us. Glad you're back!EmprerorWhiteThunder
All is forgiven. All is right in the world again! Glad you're back. I missed my funny and informative ...Laura B
Good to have you back. Great show!Not Glenn
well, good...wait...no...bad...quicksand...no quick-whatyouoghttoknow...ummm...ok see you tomorrowInsaneAI
It's just nice to have you back guys. Welcome back, and happy video blogging.Meandering
Interesting facts about the slow-sinking sand ... yeah Quicksand sounds better! Welcome back!designertoxophilite
Awesome to have the show back, I hope the earn some money week and another week was worth it in ...Ingrid
aaaaaaaaah what a releaf... (is thinking ahead, in three and a half weeks I will be closer than ever, and ...kahrytan
Suggestion: How about selling DVD Collections or making Members Only section with High Resolution videos? While rest of those don't ...Mr. Q
the light is back welcome back guys!GenJ
woot there back i all most went to there house and duck taped to the roofRabble of Redheads
Just watch the sunset and think...man I live on the beach...and all is forgiven. ;-)Cody
As always, it's been a pleasure to see you. Keep up the wit.The Nuz
Glad your back. NEVER DO THAT AGAIN! SeRiOuS WiThDrAwLs!1!1H u T c H
Glad to have you back guys. I'll call and cancel the therapist.Ali
finally ... i was having withdrawal symptomsSoul Sister
Oh my goodness...I feel so much better now. Although I don't know if just a sorry totally works...but I guess ...Robert
You are forgiven. Nice to have you back.