Don't be alarmed, but we're all going to die.
Now don’t be alarmed but we’re all gonna die. And you thought Y2K was gonna be bad. On December 21st the Mayan calendar stops. Well, that’s not exactly true. Technically we’re supposed to cycle into a new age of man. Sounds nice, but there will be pain. Oh yeah.
Those old mesoamerican mystics not only had one of the most accurate celestial calendars the world has ever known but they accurately predicted when the earth and the sun will line up with the galactic equator. Yep, were all gonna die. The only real question now is how.
Scientists currently think there is a giant black hole at the center of our galaxy and when the earth lines up with it we will be in for it. In for what? It’s a Black Hole! We don’t know, but it’s going to be bad. I mean, what about black hole sounds good? The magnetic fields on earth could shift and swap places kind of like your toilet water swirls in different directions depending on which hemisphere you live in. WHAT? And if that happens the earths crust could slip and then the south pole will move up and Alaska will be at the equator. I wonder how cheap property is there.
Whether it comes because of the earths cosmic alignment or not Scientists have predicted the next big one to hit us in 2012. No, not an earthquake, a solar storm. Okay, why is that scary? Cannibalism. Uh, you lost me. The last monster solar storm to hit the earth with inverted magnetic fields was in 1859 and it shorted out massive numbers of telegraph transformers, paralyzing ommunications.
If that happened now, everything would go. From your satellite to your cell phone towers to the electricity at your house. Our electronic infrastructure would be in complete turmoil and it would take years to rebuild. And as people in big cities realized that Wal-Mart wasn’t going to open again they would go tribal and rampage through the desert in modified piece meal vehicles the strong dominating the weak, in a never ending quest for one thing petroleum. Eating dog food out of a can. And eventually people. Do people come in a can? They will.
Think about it, you don’t know how to plant broccoli. You don’t even know what it looks like. And you have never raised a pig. Thanks to the convenience of modern supermarkets you’ll have no choice, but to eat your neighbor. What? You want another one? Wasn’t that scary enough. Okay, what about all the astroids on a collision course with the earth. 90% of the estimated 20,000 collision imminent asteroids aren’t even being tracked. It’s a funding thing. You know. Preventing disaster is too expensive. And what are you gonna do about it anyway? I mean, its a giant 3 kilometer rock coming at you at 75,000 mph. We are so dead.
What? Still not good enough. Yellowstone National Park is a super volcano. Super. [boom] That’s right, the whole park. Well, most of it anyway. The caldera is roughly 45 miles across. And guess what. It’s been acting up. At the beginning of the year there was a swam of 500 earthquakes in only 7 days. That is the volcanic equivalent of warming up… to sing. And the borders of Yellowstone lake are shifting because the land underneath is bulging. When that sucker pops, most of the US will be covered in ash and the world will enjoy a nice cozy, volcanic winter. No crops for … um a decade. Cannibalism! And when it goes it is estimated to be about 2500 times the size of 1980 Mount St. Helens eruption. No, it has nothing to do with the Mayan’s, but who cares? They don’t have the corner market on global destruction!
Whether it’s black holes, solar storms, asteroids, or super volcanos and who could forget cannibals we’re all going to die. There’s no question about it. The odds are stacked against us. Like a hundred percent. In fact the longer you live, the sooner you’ll go.
A solar storm! Why is that scary? Solar rain. It’s deadly. Even more deadly than Prince’s Purple Rain Which is deadly.
Share the show:
Copy this code onto your site or blog:
52 Comments
crazyaryiel
we can't die my yogurt expires in 2013 xDDciaya12.1
There's only one thing left to do... EAT MORE CHOCOLATE!FanOfAr
Just FYI: As of today we have 620 days left until DOOM. But who's counting? ;) Oh yeah, ...Yellowmouse
COMEDY! This is a spectacular show! Mostly, because it will never happen!poiuytqwerty
Whoa..... AAAAAH! CANIBLEISM!!!!!!!GameDroid98
If this happened, I think their would be panic and hist aria for a few year then some people would ...GameDroid98
This is one of my favorite shows! It's funny because it's so insane. CANNIBALISM! My sister and I are always ...lestatazazel
whoops meant galaxy but w.e lmaolestatazazel
lol love the video but FYI the alignment with the black hole at the center of our solar system actually ...Firelord_Pedro
the longer you live the sooner youll go :DFirelord_Pedro
LOOL!!!!! eating dog food out of a can!!!! imagine if you will a man in a rippsed t shirt with ...Nevin
I wonder how cheap land is in Antarctica. Imagine there being cities, or countries in Antarctica. Telling grand children "I ...BusRider
I wonder how my neighbour tastes?Rendlin
Also, might want to read up on your Zombie Survival Guide. It's not as simple as you think. As for ...Johnb300m
TRUE about the toilet flow [vieira_f]. All my life I've lived in Illinois. All the toilets have spun counter clockwise. Then ...Johnb300m
It would also be a good idea for everyone to have their Zombie Plans up to date before 2012. Can ...FrootLoopColorSorter [22]
LOL... "the longer you live, the sooner you're dead"!....that needs to be on a t-shirt. ahh...too funny. :)vieira_f
actually, the direction flow of toilet water flow is not dependent on what hemisphere you live in, but on the ...Neos
I'm excited now :D I've always wanted to try persondepplover316
You guys should do a show on Anime/Manga because it's getting so popular, and I don't really get why.socalcutie82 [22]
I'm with Nospinplease...i'm more afraid of dying of some random rare cancer because I once ate bananas and soda together ...the pants eater [22]
December 21, 2012. 6:11 a EST. That's when we cross the equator. **does the boom-hands thing**MrBoredism
I like...Potato salad, tea, biscuits, red t-shirts, WYOTK, and marbles. . . . But I don't like to be told when ...Nospinplease
Wow Ron... Seriously don't steriotype FOX news and if you watch WYTOK then you should know about the atmosphere. Its ...TomareUtsuZo
Please, don't apologize to people like Ron (you know those people who lack a sense of humor). All it does ...Teagan [22]
Thanks guys, I don't know what I would do without you here to brighten up my day. Go Class of 2012! ...Jennifer McKenzie
I'm not a 22er and I think there's enough doom and gloom on every other channel. Have you seen ...silverspirit
2012.... I can't wait!!! :-)steph {207}
Death is something we can't stop so why freak out so much? Oh and I've been to Yellowstone. Awesome place. ...Cullenlover
I agree with Ron... well 4 the most part =. I think u were a bit too strong about everyone ...RandomGuy
I believe you have forgotten something you've already done a show on, MAD (Mutually Assured Destruction) with a nuclear attack. ...graceofbass [22]
Well, my in-laws live on a farm, so I figure if all the electicity is gone I'll take my family ...dieselhead [22]
What a foreign concept... people die? What? Donner Party, Soccer players in plane crashes or Fijians because they are tough ...ItzMeRon
....I guess you have to be a moron to get into [22]. How seriously unexpected. No one said there was ...socalcutie82 [22]
I say no need to apologize too...did Ron not see the Terms of Use video? While this show can ...Curtis [22]
Wow. That MUST be it. LOLItzMeRon
Of course you disagree....You are a [22]'er.Curtis [22]
Sorry, but I must repectfully disagree with Ron. Brothers Winn...you have no reason to apologize. The lightheartedness was ...AngInAmerica
So, are you guys talking about "polar shift," aka "polar wander" here or are you talking about geomagnetic reversal? ...ItzMeRon
And btw, this topic is posted here: http://www.thezeitgeistmovement.com/joomla/index.php?option=com_kunena&Itemid=3&func=view&catid=5&id=57613graceofbass [22]
This reminds me of the Tom Lehrer song "We Will All Go Together When We Go" written during the Cold ...ItzMeRon
I understand.....And do not feel you need to answer me at all here. But please consider: At what point do ...The Brothers Winn
Sorry Ron, It was completely tongue in cheek. We were just having fun with the hysteria around 2012.ItzMeRon
I love your show and I love you. I also love the guy behind the camera..... ....But I do not love ...Nospinplease
You forgot about Iran and Russia, they could start a nuclear attack on us. It's creepy some of the stuff ...CrazyDave
Purple Rain...is...people??? Wait if the super volcano goes, won't we be able to roast...like everything?? ...and Drorharush...please...disasters don't kill people...people kill people...wait..no...put ...Meandering {207}
"Soylent Green is PEOPLE!!" Well death was going to happen anyway right, might as well happen at the hands ...designertoxophilite[22] [22]
But Noooooo the london Olympics are in 2012! and I was going to go and watch the archery.... Fortunately I know ...Drorharush [22]
We are all going to die, not because of a super volcano, an asteroid or the poles shifting, we are ...Jennifer McKenzie
LMAO!!! Okay, so I'll have you know, I DO know how to plant broccoli. I just have a ...Drecon [22]
Finally a REALLY informative article. Time to buy a meat grinder and make some friends I guess. I'm gonna eat ...TomareUtsuZo
*laughs* Oh my, I knew there was a reason to stay up late.